To recap from my last review: porn – love it (who doesn’t?). Comics – love them (duh). Hard to Swallow #1 – buy it (now). This week I continue to look at gay porn comics with an offering from Class Comics: The Incredibly Hung Naked Justice. But first I have to say something.

Cock.

Heh heh.

Wasn’t sure I could get away with it, and I have to be able to say “cock” because 90% of Naked Justice is about the cock. Huge cocks. UNBELIEVEABLY huge cocks. If Barbie were a guy, she’d have a cock like these guys. Believe it or not, the remaining 10% is invested in engaging storylines. Can you imagine someone saying, “Yeah, I read Class Comics for the cutting edge character development” without irony? After reading two of their books (the second one was The Pornomicon, reviewed in a separate article), I believe it could happen.

Patrick Fillion's Naked Justice combines the best of porn and comics – not only is the sex graphic and pervasive, and the men hung like the Lincoln Center chandelier, but Superman wishes he were as buff as these guys (though Brandon Routh from all pictorial evidence might give them a run for their money in the “nice package” department); Batman and Robin (a la Joel Schumacher) have nipple envy; and even in her kinkiest days, Wonder Woman was never rendered so helpless before a villain (“knocked out with your cock out” would sum this up nicely). It could only be better if chocolate were somehow involved (Patrick, take note!).

The titular character begins his crime-fighting career when his job interview at a bank is interrupted by a robbery. Right away, we know he’s different from other superheroes – not only does he dispense justice (mostly) in the raw, but he’s comfortable enough with his sexuality to make off-the-cuff fashion quips (“I can’t stop this robbery while I’m imprisoned in the itchy cotton-poly blend of Felix Himner, but I sure as hell can take matters into my own hands as the fetchingly accessorized Naked Justice.”). He makes the Rawhide Kid look like a closet case. Soon afterward, he is approached by the boob-a-licous Jeanne Darque and her “well-built associate” Ghost Boy to join their “new team of crime-fighting, super-powered, sexually-active beings who don’t mind having their XXX-rated adventures chronicled in modestly priced, superbly illustrated comic books.” Of course, he accepts because… who wouldn’t? I mean, besides Jerry Fallwell. (And kudos to Patrick for working in a bit of self-adulation. It would seem immodest if it weren’t so true.)

And, oh my goodness, the XXX rating is apt. Naked Justice shows it all. In every way possible (some seemingly impossible). Patrick knows his way around a porn shoot, giving each character maximum exposure. There is literally no angle left unexplored (and Patrick works those angles well) and maybe a dozen positions left unused (the three-way train was classic!). Heaven help us if a blue-skinned Indian god-like character joins the cast because it’ll be the gay Kama Sutra. The under-the-influence three-way between NJ, Ghost Boy and Camili-Cat is a wet, sylvan affair, and, ya know, the hottest thing was Ghost Boy taking his mask off to reveal a face that isn’t just a skull. I was actually worried about that for a while. A friend of mine in college had a crush on the Prince from Beauty and the Beast, just utterly captivated by his beauty. I never understood that ‘til Ghost Boy, however sad that may sound.

What I admire most about Patrick Fillion’s work (besides the visuals) is his humor. Yes, yes! I read Naked Justice for the story! I’m sorry. I’m a bad gay man with a penis. Honestly though, it’s a funny read. The dialogue is completely stylized - full of grand pronouncements and amazingly long sentences that contain up to four or five reminders that Naked Justice and his compadres are campy homos with insatiable sexual appetites. And huge cocks (have I mentioned that yet? Huge cocks!). I swear I snarfed Coke out my nose when Naked Justice, being penetrated by his own member while under the hypnotic control of Giganticor, declared, “My mind says ‘Stop!’ but my prostate says, ‘Just a little to the left, please!” Who wouldn’t laugh at that? I mean, besides Ann Coulter. I’m glad Patrick doesn’t take the story seriously. Porn that acts like it’s high art becomes melodrama – which is a bad kind of funny (like that documentary Exposed: The Making of a Legend. Oh lord! When the writer said he wanted to make Buckleroos like a heroic epic and how the characters were really archetypes, I stood up in the theatre and yelled, “It’s porn, for God’s sake, not The Song of Hiawatha!”). I also have to mention NJ’s super-power – he shoots electric bolts from his penis. It’s just brilliant.

And Naked Justice himself... well, he might not be the most vibrate-y dildo in the nightstand, but his heart is in the right place. I like this guy, and want to see more of him – uh, his stories. It would be impossible to see more of him without an MRI.

Naked Justice #1 is available in both black-and-white and color versions. I prefer the B&W because it seems cleaner to me. My fruit fly, Michelle, disagrees. She thinks the color helps her find the cocks quicker. According to her, they “pop off the page”. To each their own. Get a copy of each and decide for yourself which you like better.

Editor's note: Buy this comic here or ask for it at your local comics shop.

Sean McGrath loves strawberry margaritas. The fruity drinks can be air-mailed to him in special packages filled with dry ice at his Austin, Texas, address. Email him at stseanoftheknife@austin.rr.com for that address.

All images and characters TM and © 2006 Patrick Fillion/Class Comics. Review © 2006 Sean McGrath.

Prism Comics promotes the works of the LGBT community in comics. It does not implicitly endorse any other material or products associated with those works. Any opinions expressed are those of the author(s).